Category: Anorexia

Almost a year has passed since Summer was diagnosed with her eating disorder (ED). I glimpse signs of recovery more often, but sometimes, we get thrown back into the darkness. The darkness doesn’t last as long now, though, before hope reappears. I know hope is always there despite being hard...

Calorie is a word laden with a myriad of connotations imposed by diet culture, a word that can be so insidious that I’ve hesitated to write about it. From the impressionable age of 11, I became aware of my body in a new, mysterious way. In tandem with entering that...

Anorexia very nearly stole my life. After 15 years in what can only be described as a living hell, I was told I had only a few weeks to live; my dear body couldn’t hold on any longer. I could feel myself slipping away; after more than a decade of...

When the news broke, I couldn’t ignore it. The deceased young woman was reportedly at the Korean hospital for treatment of a weight loss drug addiction. News portals showed CCTV (closed circuit TV) footage of the woman, where she was forcibly restrained on a bed by hospital staff whose large...

“Why does eating disorder recovery have so many curve balls?” A middle-aged woman asked this today. An eating disorder trigger was tempting her, and she was bravely reaching out for support. The holiday season and long weekends, which most people love, are difficult for her. With members of her usual...

Anyone who has struggled with an eating disorder (ED) is familiar with the words trigger or triggered, and I am no different. Even though I am in the space of recovery, situations that could trigger eating disorder thoughts and behaviours are everywhere. Living in this diet culture/weight-biased world, there is...

I am not anorexic. I never was anorexic. I am in recovery from anorexia, which is a parasitic, all-consuming mental condition that sucked the joy out of every aspect of my life like a Dementor*. But even though anorexia controlled most of my life, I never wanted it to be...

Living a part-life with an eating disorder (ED) is like spending half your life in prison – without committing a crime. The picture that accompanies this story was taken the day my daughter celebrated her 21st birthday. I was 46 years old and an inpatient at a private mental health...

I’ve always considered apathy to be negative. The dictionary defines apathy as a lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern. Conducting a little research about apathy and whether it’s considered an emotion, I was interested to discover it’s actually a lack of emotion, which makes perfect sense. Apathy is the opposite...

Until a few months ago, my diaries and I had been inseparable for more than 60 years. We had stuck together despite moving house more than 24 times in my search for peace within. Never a day apart. The diaries were my one constant from age 12. They were my...